Thank you for taking an interest in this topic. It’s not lost on me how this blog entry will pique the interest of only a segment of parents of elementary school-aged children, and may even turn off some of those who’ve read my book or prior entries. So, why did I decide to cover this potentially polarizing topic?
For one, it’s a topic of deep personal interest to me as a Christian father of two children. My wife and I are making a conscious effort to raise our kids in the faith. Also, this can be a sensitive matter to chat about with other adults, let alone discuss with our own kids. And I suspect there are other parents who contemplate how to best engage their children in conversation about faith. Now that we’ve established the purpose of this article, let’s dive into the hard stuff.
As covered in detail throughout my recently published book, Help from the Principal’s Office, children tend to subconsciously mirror the way in which their parents conduct themselves in the world; including the extent to which they embody and practice their faith. If we rarely or never discuss our belief in Christ, our kids will follow suit. Conversely, if we openly describe what our faith means to us, our children will be more inclined to do so themselves. If we present as comfortable in our faith, so will our kids in theirs. Which is why, Christian parents have a golden opportunity to deepen their own faith. How? By cultivating the belief of eternal salvation through Jesus within the hearts of their children.
Talking about the Christian faith with kids can be an incredibly rewarding experience for both parents and children. In my book, I cover how to initiate and sustain challenging conversations with our kids. The topic of faith is one of great depth, and is meant to transcend our physical existence as human beings. A complex phenomena, but one in which kids can meaningfully embrace nonetheless. Importantly, faith is not a concept to be understood by the mind, rather, an approach to life through the heart. Hebrews 11:1 (KJV) captures this sentiment perfectly: Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen. The evidence of things not seen. That is an incredibly powerful definition of faith, and is concise enough to profoundly resonate with your child. Our kids should know that faith is believing in the invisible just as we believe in what is seen, heard, smelled, and touched.
Inquisitive kids will want to “know” what faith is. But knowing comes from knowledge, and knowledge is learned. If you desire for your son or daughter to live their life through the lens of faith in Jesus, then I would encourage you to communicate how faith is not merely an idea. Kids need to know that faith involves trusting in God to protect and guide them through life. To help kids understand that faith is not merely learned, cite the contrast of learning to read and solve math problems in school, whereas faith is different in that no one can teach them how to “do” faith. Faith is not an action, but it can and should be put into action. Faith needs to be cultivated. But first, how do we plant the seed of faith within the psyches and souls of our children? By clearly and unequivocally stating the core beliefs in which our faith resides:
- Jesus died on the cross.
- On the third day, Jesus rose from the dead.
- By believing in numbers 1 and 2 with all of our hearts for the remainder of our lives, we are guaranteed eternal life in heaven with Jesus.
Romans 10:9 (KJV) encapsulates the above succinctly: That if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved. What great news to relay to your child! Their eternal salvation is guaranteed by believing that He died and rose from the dead. If you believe with unwavering conviction, and make your faith apparent through your words and actions, then your son or daughter will follow your lead. Some adults think this promise from God is too good to be true, so it is reasonable to anticipate initial skepticism from some children.
That is where you come in.
If you tell your child that you believe in His promise, and explain how you take comfort in knowing that eternity in heaven with Christ awaits you due to your belief that He rose from the dead, then make no mistake; your child will believe this to be true for themselves as well.
As I cover in the final Part of Help from the Principal’s Office, kids’ early life experiences significantly influence their middle and high school years, and eventually adulthood. Therefore, there is no better time than the present to begin or perhaps accelerate the pace of your child’s journey in faith. If we want our kids to grow in their faith, it is our responsibility to lay the foundation for such growth to occur. The foundation is this: Jesus died on the cross, rose from the dead, and offers us eternity in heaven with him. My part, your part, your child’s part? To simply believe. It is this sustained belief that transforms into faith, a faith that will never leave your son or daughter feeling alone or hopeless.
God will always be with them. All they need to do is accept His generous offer. How can you convince your child to accept His offer? Actually, this is really easy, and won’t take much convincing at all. All you need to do in order to facilitate your kid’s acceptance of the offer is to make it clear how you’ve accepted His offer of eternal salvation. To seal the deal, don’t shy away from expressing how grateful you are for their opportunity to join you and other believers in eternal salvation. This is an offer your child won’t be able to refuse.
Once these core beliefs are accepted as truth, and the foundation for a faith-based life has been established, how do we cultivate faith in our kids? There are several ways to do so. One of the most effective ways to cultivate the Christian faith in our children is to lead by example. Specifically, 2 Corinthians 5:7 comes to mind: For we walk by faith, not by sight. In other words, not only do we ‘talk the talk’, we also ‘walk the walk’. Now, this can be far from easy, carrying ourselves in a way consistent with the teachings of Jesus. But as I emphasize throughout my book, we as parents don’t need to be perfect. We just need to be authentic, with flaws and all.
Faith can also be cultivated in children by watching biblically inspired movies such as The Prince of Egypt and Joseph: King of Dreams. Both are excellent in every way, for both kids and adults. When watching these movies with your children, use the character plots and dialogue to spur conversation. Consider pausing the movie when a talking point jumps out at you, then briefly chat with your son or daughter before you resume watching. I did so while watching both of these animated movies with my kids, and they seemed to benefit from the organic teaching moments. For example (spoiler alert!), when Joseph eventually forgives his brothers for their past betrayal, you can pause and say something along the lines of “Isn’t that amazing how Joseph was willing to forgive them, and how his forgiveness led to stronger relationships than ever before?”. Other ways to cultivate the Christian faith within your child include:
- Using discretion, discuss personal challenges you’ve had with faith
- Cite examples of how your faith has improved the quality of your life
- Discuss how their lives will be profoundly (positively) impacted by deepened faith
- Read books such as this one with your child
- Have fun with reputable trivia resources such as Ministry-to-Children
As Christian parents, we can diffuse self-imposed pressure by acknowledging the mysterious nature of faith. Parents of young children don’t need to have answers to all questions posed by their sons and daughters. If you would like to further explore this sentiment, I would encourage you to read more here. Kids need to know that faith is embraced, not known. Children also need to be explicitly told that others in their lives, perhaps even family or friends, will think it’s nonsense that Christ was crucified, rose from the dead, and offers eternal salvation for those who believe. Fortunately, as their parent, you can also explicitly communicate that God sends such challenges our way to test and deepen our faith. Kids should know the deeper their faith, the closer they get to Jesus. The closer they get to Jesus, the closer they get to heaven during this lifetime.
I hope you found this blog entry helpful. Although a departure from the nature of my previous blogs, it was a topic I felt compelled to cover. I will leave you with one of my favorite bible verses within the intellectual grasp of many children: Give thanks to the LORD, for he is good! His faithful love endures forever – Psalms 107:1 (NLT)
Scott